The Kryptonite Curse Crippling Midlife Confidence

How a Single, Stupid Word Can Sabotage Your Midlife Superpowers.

We’ve all been there. Standing in front of the mirror, coffee in hand, replaying the day’s to-do list in our heads. And then it sneaks in—that tiny, toxic word: should.

"I should have gone to the gym."

"I should be further along in my career."

"I should feel grateful, not exhausted."

Sound familiar?

Should is the sneakiest—and shittiest— of all words. It’s like that annoying friend who pretends they’re giving you helpful advice but is really just making you feel bad about yourself. And let me tell you—it’s hitting midlife women HARD.

At this point in life, we’re juggling careers, relationships, health changes, family dynamics, and maybe even aging parents. But somehow, should still manages to whisper (or shout) that we’re not doing enough, being enough, or achieving enough.

And let’s be real—that word has got to go.

Before we dive deeper, I want to share a quirky little poem I wrote about should that sums up exactly why this word is no friend of ours. It’s playful, a little sassy, and it might just make you rethink how often you let should run the show in your life.

My little Poem about SHOULD

The should hit the fan.
A should load
I’ve been scared should less
I was up should’s creek (with/without the paddle)
And I could give two shoulds.

I mean, really…This is some crazy should
But.. Tough should
For shoulds and giggles, I’ve been should out of luck
But honestly? This is just should-y

I got into some bad should, but For the love of should, can we just stop this already?
I’m done holding my should together.
My grandma Agnes would say that’s a should-ass or a dickshould (she had a mouth of a sailor).
DID YOU KNOW THAT WHEN YOU SAY THE WORD “should” YOUR MOUTH DOES THE SAME MOTION AS YOUR assHOLE?

When the should hits the fan, turn it into just that… a pile of steaming should.
Should happens, but get your should together. Wow, this poem is a crock of should.
Now that I’ve worn out this word, does it carry power over me anymore? Nah, that should do it.
Oh shit.

Now back to our regularly scheduled program…

See what I mean? Should is like the passive-aggressive guest at your midlife party—always pointing out what could be better while completely ignoring how far you’ve come.

But here’s the thing:

Should keeps us stuck in the gap between expectation and reality. It’s a word that feeds guilt, stifles joy, and strangles self-compassion. Every time you say “I should” you’re telling yourself that who you are and what you’re doing isn’t good enough. And that’s just not true. The patriarchy should cannot win this one.

What if we swapped out should for something softer, kinder—like could or might?

"I could go to the gym today, or I could rest because my body needs it."

"I might explore a new career path, or I might find joy right where I am."

Ooo, see the difference? Suddenly, YOU are in control. You’re making choices, not following some invisible rulebook written by society, family expectations, or your inner critic (man, I hate that bitch).

So, here’s your challenge: For the next week, catch yourself every time you say should. Swap it out for something empowering. And watch how your confidence starts to climb.

Because you, my gorgeous, are doing just fine.

Actually… you’re doing amazing.

Let’s ditch the should and start owning our midlife superpower again.

Drop me a comment: What’s one should you’re ready to kick to the curb this week? Let’s celebrate the freedom together!